My mom has me so convinced that I will not be able to do
anything right in this world. I’m lazy, I have horrible grades, I don’t do
anything at home, I won’t be able to get a job let alone go to college. I will
live under a bridge and learn how to survive.
I have all these secrets that my parents don’t even know. One day after my mom yelled at me and told me that I was a whore who only went to school to flirt with boys, hook up and not study. She just left the house. She left to get her mind off things. It’s happened before. I knew she’d come back. But when she left, I grabbed the kitchen knife, and went to my room closing the door behind me. Bawling, shaking, and sitting on the floor with my knees to my chest….
I don’t know how I didn’t do it.
I don’t know how I stopped myself
But after hours, I came out of my room.
My mom was there.
I asked her if I could go to youth group at church.
Her reply was asking me, “Do you need to go confess how many guys you’ve fucked?”
First of all, I have a purity ring.
Second of all, the first thing ^ above, should sum up the whole ridiculous accusation.
You know how, when you get a bad grade your parents talk to you?
After my mom “talks” with me, I don’t feel motivated to do more, I don’t feel like doing my best and showing that I’ve got what it takes.
I feel like giving up. I feel like she’s right. I won’t be able to do anything in life.
I want to drop out of high school. I’ll find a job and find a way. But I know that I won’t be able to do anything at school. I won’t pass my classes I won't go to college, I won't get the job that i've always wanted. I won't be the person I wanted to be.
I am after all, trash from the street.
I have all these secrets that my parents don’t even know. One day after my mom yelled at me and told me that I was a whore who only went to school to flirt with boys, hook up and not study. She just left the house. She left to get her mind off things. It’s happened before. I knew she’d come back. But when she left, I grabbed the kitchen knife, and went to my room closing the door behind me. Bawling, shaking, and sitting on the floor with my knees to my chest….
I don’t know how I didn’t do it.
I don’t know how I stopped myself
But after hours, I came out of my room.
My mom was there.
I asked her if I could go to youth group at church.
Her reply was asking me, “Do you need to go confess how many guys you’ve fucked?”
First of all, I have a purity ring.
Second of all, the first thing ^ above, should sum up the whole ridiculous accusation.
You know how, when you get a bad grade your parents talk to you?
After my mom “talks” with me, I don’t feel motivated to do more, I don’t feel like doing my best and showing that I’ve got what it takes.
I feel like giving up. I feel like she’s right. I won’t be able to do anything in life.
I want to drop out of high school. I’ll find a job and find a way. But I know that I won’t be able to do anything at school. I won’t pass my classes I won't go to college, I won't get the job that i've always wanted. I won't be the person I wanted to be.
I am after all, trash from the street.
Don't listen! You can do all those things. Yes, you might have to work harder than others but in the end you'll be with everyone else, passing those classes, getting the job you want, even being able to go to college. You need to prove your mom wrong and the only way to do that is to continue to try. Don't ever give up because God is there by your side even when you don't think he is. He is putting you through these obstacles to see if you can pass them and trust me, you're halfway there. We have two more years until college. Two more years! You've been in school for about 6-7 years. I think you can do two more years of high school. When college comes, that's a whole different ballgame but it's a challenge we all have to face and we'll do it together. Don't give up just for something one person is saying because everyone else is cheering you on though you don't know it. I'm on of those cheering you on.
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